Guest blog by Mason, Ivy Societe escort
Ever heard the phrase, “You live and you learn”? Well, that’s been my mantra ever since I embarked on a journey as a male escort in Sydney. Now, you might be curious, a bit shocked, or perhaps chuckling at the unorthodoxy of my profession. However, I assure you that the lessons I’ve learnt in this often overlooked, occasionally maligned profession, have equipped me with a set of skills and experiences that are invaluable and frankly, fascinating. It’s time to invite you into this unique side of Sydney – a world that exists far away from the iconic Opera House and the Harbour Bridge.
I Was Never Just ‘The Guy’
Upon starting as a male escort in Sydney, the biggest shock was the realization that I was much more than ‘just’ an escort. My role was so diverse that it’d give any multifaceted job a run for its money. I was a professional date, a conversationalist, a confidant, a therapist, and on rare occasions, even a shoulder to cry on.
I remember when I was new to the scene, there was a client, let’s call her Amanda. Amanda was a high-powered executive, living a life that many would deem enviable. However, beneath the shiny veneer of her lifestyle, she was profoundly lonely. Our meetings weren’t just about filling an escort’s role; it was about providing companionship, listening to her stories, her dreams and her fears. This is where the real work of an escort shines through. The escort world is a vast landscape that demands more than just physicality; it’s about providing emotional and intellectual comfort.
Emotions? It’s Complicated
As I delved deeper into my work, I started to understand that emotions were a crucial part of the job. They could not be ignored, but neither could they be allowed to take over. It was a lesson that Lisa, another client of mine, taught me.
Lisa and I shared a bond that often transcended our professional relationship. It was easy to forget that what we had was a professional arrangement. It was tempting to blur the lines, to mistake the feelings of camaraderie and closeness for something more. However, I learnt the hard way that I had to constantly remind myself – this is a job. It’s about delivering an unforgettable experience for Lisa, not about getting entangled in personal feelings. It’s a delicate dance between emotional authenticity and professional boundaries, but once you’ve mastered it, it’s quite liberating.
Being Authentic is Key
My initial days in the industry were fraught with a common rookie mistake – trying to fit into a mould. People often have a preconceived notion about male escorts – we’re expected to be suave, debonair figures right out of a romance novel. But reality, as I’ve come to learn, is quite different.
The key to success in this industry isn’t about pretending to be someone else, it’s about being authentic. That’s one thing I appreciate about Sydney’s escort culture; it has room for everyone, no matter your background, your looks or your quirks. And online directories like Ivy Societe amplify this sentiment. They offer a platform where you can be yourself and find clients who appreciate you for you.
Your Boundaries Matter
Boundaries are not just lines drawn on sand; they are, in essence, your values, your comfort, and your respect. I cannot stress enough how crucial setting boundaries are in this line of work. There’s a perception that escorts
are at the beck and call of their clients’ whims and fancies. I believed this too, initially. However, I soon learned that being assertive about what I was comfortable with was not only accepted but also respected.
Take the instance with a client I’ll call Rose. Rose was sweet but sometimes demanded services that I wasn’t comfortable with. It took a few challenging interactions for me to realise that it was okay to say no. That lesson transformed my professional life. Your physical and mental wellbeing are just as important as providing a good service, if not more.
Stereotypes and Stigma – The Unwanted Baggage
Yes, the elephant in the room – society’s stigma and prejudices. One of the toughest aspects of being a male escort is dealing with the stereotypes and biases that society has against this profession. There are people who look down upon us, who misunderstand what we do, and it hurts. It’s not always easy to shrug it off.
But over time, I’ve learned to focus on the positives. We male escorts provide a service that many need but few acknowledge. We give companionship, comfort, and a listening ear. And no stigma can overshadow the importance of that. Being part of this community, we stand up for each other, share our experiences, and help each other rise above the negativity. This camaraderie is one of the aspects of this profession that I value most.
The Value of Discretion
Sydney’s cosmopolitan culture attracts a diverse clientele – from high-profile figures to those just looking for a quiet, private escape from their routine life. One unspoken rule in this industry is the importance of discretion. It forms the foundation of trust between you and your clients.
Remembering this principle has served me well over the years. It’s not just about not revealing the identities of your clients but also about understanding the nuanced ways in which discretion is maintained. From choosing a discrete meeting place to understanding when to make small talk, the art of discretion is multifaceted.
The Ongoing Learning Curve
There are many lessons I’ve learned along the way. It’s been a journey, an experience that’s far removed from my initial expectations. But through all the trials, the errors, the good times and the challenging ones, I’ve grown as a person.
Becoming a male escort isn’t for everyone. But for those willing to take the plunge, it can be rewarding and enlightening. The lessons I’ve learned in this journey are countless, and I’m sure there are many more to come. If there’s one thing I wish I knew before embarking on this path, it’s that being a male escort is more than just a job, it’s a lifestyle.
The world of male escorts in Sydney is diverse, exciting, and at times, challenging. It’s a world that demands emotional intelligence, authenticity, and the art of balancing professional boundaries. I hope that sharing my experiences has given you an insight into our often misunderstood profession, and if you are considering this path, I wish you all the success.
Want to Know More?
If you’re intrigued and would like to delve deeper into the experiences and insights of other male escorts, there are many resources available. Numerous escorting blogs such as The Honest Courtesan, written by an ex-sex worker, offer compelling narratives and reflections on this often misunderstood industry. Another excellent read is Hobo Hobo, a blog that follows the journey of a male escort in London, offering readers an intimate understanding of this profession from an international perspective.
Books like the ‘The Male Escort’s Handbook: Your Guide to Getting Rich the Hard Way’ by Aaron Lawrence provide an insightful guide to those considering stepping into the industry, or for anyone curious about the ins and outs of male escorting.
Research papers, such as the study published in Culture, Health & Sexuality, titled ‘Male sex work from Latin American immigrants in New York City: a preliminary report’ delve into the world of male escorts from an academic standpoint, providing objective and in-depth information about various aspects of the industry.
